Patience is indeed a virtue

Hi, it's Lilly. First off, while Amanda and I are obviously having our own individual experiences currently, we are sometimes very much in sync...

 I am currently in the midst of technical rehearsals at the Goodman which means back-to-back 14 hour days, so I apologize for not sharing updates. (Amanda, you're the best). This also means I haven't seen Bev since she got the tubes removed, so I haven't yet been able to see her whole face, as I hear (and know) is beautiful. 

I was talking to my mom (Amanda's Aunt Linda) briefly today and mentioned that about Bev and Mom replied, in a matter-of-fact way as if you were telling her that grass is green, "She's always been beautiful." Next! :)

It's been frustrating being away and not being able to talk to her or touch her as I had been daily, but I must be patient until the schedule eases up (I have Monday off and can't wait!). In a couple of weeks or less I'll be able to post more relevant things about Bev's recovery here, too.

I had just checked my messages and gotten word that Bev's lung had collapsed about a half hour before getting on the train to go home around 11:45 p.m. As Chicagoans know, the CTA is nothing but an exercise in patience. The trains were operating on one track, and for what seemed like ages we were at a standstill. Normally this would be a minor frustration, but tonight, especially since I had just gotten the news and knew how Amanda must be feeling, everything inside started to seize up and I nearly had a full-out panic attack. Nothing on the iPod was going to do any good, I had nothing to read and every cell in my body was screaming for some kind of forward motion.. until I had to tell myself that what was happening in my body and in my outside world was nothing compared to the amount of work that Bev's is doing right now. I had to remember that the body is an amazing, self-healing work of art when it wants to be (and when the spirit is cooperating), and that was what I thought about for the snail's pace ride home that took almost an hour. It was still a small pain to be patient, but it really was nothing.

After a few false starts and moving forward in inches, it's a real gift to have a ride where you resume traveling smoothly into the night, comfortably to your destination. If you're with my analogy so far, the waiting is definitely the hardest part.

My parents told me that in the airport on their way home Friday, flights were delayed due to bad weather and the general uproar of angry passengers was something to behold. Here it was, a weekend, and unless these people had sick or dying family members or had to save the world the next day, why on earth were they getting so bent out of shape? It made me really mad to hear this. They would rather risk their lives on a plane in bad weather than wait a few hours? I'd like them to meet Bev and Amanda, who has more patience in her little finger than they have as a big, spoiled group.

Since last week I feel the same way about jaywalkers who dart in front of cars just to shave a couple of seconds off their commute. Sorry. I know this isn't about Bev, per se. It's just that things look different now. 

People are wonderful, too, of course. My coworker, Sherry, who got off work to drive me to the hospital last Friday, told me today that her Mom didn't get any sleep last night as she was praying for Bev. She's met me but not Bev, and it's nothing short of a miracle that she is doing this. I know others are doing this as well, and really...wow. 

I've been thinking of the people we have never met that were there for Bev last week, too. The police, paramedics, concerned passersby... Rapid response is crucial in traumatic injuries, and Bev would not be on the road to recovery she is now without the people who make it their life's work to help others who are strangers to them. While I've never taken them for granted, this is as big a blessing as the love and support Bev and the family are receiving on a daily basis. A huge thank you to them, wherever they are.

A little personal note because I haven't yet signed up to post comments:

Amanda, thank you for posting these gorgeous and thoughtful pictures! I was going through photos of the three of us and the two of you together and was completely moved when I saw you were thinking the same thing. YOU are beautiful, and while I've always been proud that you're my cousin, now it's off the charts. You go, too, girl!