Two steps forward, one step back
Hi everyone,
My day started out great...I got to the hospital with Kerry and Kelly and we went up to see her. She still looks beautiful with all those monitors out of her mouth and face. The nurse taking care of her today was SOOO nice, and very good at updating and explaining. As I started to ask my daily questions about the ICPs and the bag level and all, she informed me that the drain was in fact clamped and had been all morning...and the pressures were normal!!! One step forward.
Mom was breathing over the ventillator quite a bit this afternoon also, and they had turned down the settings to deliver only 6 breaths per minute instead of 12 because she was doing so much on her own! Of course, the breaths she takes on her own are more shallow and not quite deep enough, but it's a start! Her labs, gases, blood counts and everything were all good. They analyze a sample of the CSF (cerebral spinal fluid) from the ICP drain periodically, and the contents have been good and normal. She will have another CT scan either this evening or tomorrow morning to check on things. The only bad thing was that the arterial line they'd finally gotten placed in her left foot has quit working (her blood vessels must be so fragile) and they had made several attempts to replace it with no success. The next step will probably be to place a femoral line (the femoral artery is located in the groin) for the best access. More pokes for her. :( So we spent about 3.5 hours hanging out with her and waiting to touch base with her trauma doctor, which we did, and he was nice but it was the first time I'd met this particular one. It takes me a little bit to get used to someone taking care of her.
At dinner, I got a call from the hospital with some discouraging news...in reviewing a routine chest xray they had done, they discovered mom has a pneumothorax (collapsed lung) and they need my consent to place a chest tube to relieve it. I of course consented, and the relatively upbeat mood of the dinner and the afternoon plummetted into more anxiety. We headed back over to the hospital, where the sweet day nurse assured me this is a very common complication associated with patients on ventillators and that in the grand scheme of things was not a huge deal. But of course every little thing seems to me a big deal, especially when my poor dear sweet mom has to be poked even further. So I had another one of my famous and more frequent meltdowns at the nurse's station, and the nurses I knew in addition to my dear Kelly were very helpful in calming me down. I try not to do that in front of mom if I can help it because I want her to see me only upbeat and strong so she can be so too, but sometimes it comes through by accident.
Anyway, we tried to comfort her as best as we could with healing touch and soothing voices but she had gone through the procedure and come out stressed and anxious, so she was breathing even faster, her heart rate was up and so was her blood pressure. Then they came and said the chest tube needed to be adjusted because it was in just a little too far, so we did all that calming for nothing. My heart couldn't take anymore for the evening, so we watched while they set up everything, and when there was still no sign of the doctor, we just continued our healing, calming touch. I think she was more relaxed when we left, I just hope they don't get her too riled up again tonight. They said they may need to increase her sedation to help decrease her BP and her respirations so she can rest and relax. I'm all about that, whatever she needs to heal.
As for me, that phone call from the doctor just reinforces to me that I cannot quite relax...the ring of the phone still makes my heart jump everytime, and today will just perpetuate that. I'm trying to remember this is just a small setback, but it's hard. I want smooth sailing, I'm not interested in the occasional wave - but I guess that's what it's all about. Patience is a virtue.
Please keep praying and loving. I know it's helping.
My day started out great...I got to the hospital with Kerry and Kelly and we went up to see her. She still looks beautiful with all those monitors out of her mouth and face. The nurse taking care of her today was SOOO nice, and very good at updating and explaining. As I started to ask my daily questions about the ICPs and the bag level and all, she informed me that the drain was in fact clamped and had been all morning...and the pressures were normal!!! One step forward.
Mom was breathing over the ventillator quite a bit this afternoon also, and they had turned down the settings to deliver only 6 breaths per minute instead of 12 because she was doing so much on her own! Of course, the breaths she takes on her own are more shallow and not quite deep enough, but it's a start! Her labs, gases, blood counts and everything were all good. They analyze a sample of the CSF (cerebral spinal fluid) from the ICP drain periodically, and the contents have been good and normal. She will have another CT scan either this evening or tomorrow morning to check on things. The only bad thing was that the arterial line they'd finally gotten placed in her left foot has quit working (her blood vessels must be so fragile) and they had made several attempts to replace it with no success. The next step will probably be to place a femoral line (the femoral artery is located in the groin) for the best access. More pokes for her. :( So we spent about 3.5 hours hanging out with her and waiting to touch base with her trauma doctor, which we did, and he was nice but it was the first time I'd met this particular one. It takes me a little bit to get used to someone taking care of her.
At dinner, I got a call from the hospital with some discouraging news...in reviewing a routine chest xray they had done, they discovered mom has a pneumothorax (collapsed lung) and they need my consent to place a chest tube to relieve it. I of course consented, and the relatively upbeat mood of the dinner and the afternoon plummetted into more anxiety. We headed back over to the hospital, where the sweet day nurse assured me this is a very common complication associated with patients on ventillators and that in the grand scheme of things was not a huge deal. But of course every little thing seems to me a big deal, especially when my poor dear sweet mom has to be poked even further. So I had another one of my famous and more frequent meltdowns at the nurse's station, and the nurses I knew in addition to my dear Kelly were very helpful in calming me down. I try not to do that in front of mom if I can help it because I want her to see me only upbeat and strong so she can be so too, but sometimes it comes through by accident.
Anyway, we tried to comfort her as best as we could with healing touch and soothing voices but she had gone through the procedure and come out stressed and anxious, so she was breathing even faster, her heart rate was up and so was her blood pressure. Then they came and said the chest tube needed to be adjusted because it was in just a little too far, so we did all that calming for nothing. My heart couldn't take anymore for the evening, so we watched while they set up everything, and when there was still no sign of the doctor, we just continued our healing, calming touch. I think she was more relaxed when we left, I just hope they don't get her too riled up again tonight. They said they may need to increase her sedation to help decrease her BP and her respirations so she can rest and relax. I'm all about that, whatever she needs to heal.
As for me, that phone call from the doctor just reinforces to me that I cannot quite relax...the ring of the phone still makes my heart jump everytime, and today will just perpetuate that. I'm trying to remember this is just a small setback, but it's hard. I want smooth sailing, I'm not interested in the occasional wave - but I guess that's what it's all about. Patience is a virtue.
Please keep praying and loving. I know it's helping.
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