Flying solo

Hi Friends,

Well, today was the first day I haven't had a single visitor all day, and I actually did pretty okay considering. Of course, it took me until about 2pm to actually leave the house, but I made myself go. Sweet Kerry had sent me a gift card to Barnes & Noble, so I forced myself to go there first and pick out some books. Then I forced myself to get an ice cream cone from McDonald's and look in a shoe store. I hated every minute of it because I was by myself, and because I wasn't at mom's side, and because mom and I went to every single one of those places together not long before the accident. But I did it, and now I've done it. Just the same, I don't think I want to have another day like it anytime soon.

So I spent the rest of my afternoon and evening with mom. She was calmer today, not so agitated and didn't thrash so much, which is good. Her heart rate was lower too, which made me happy. When I arrived, they had the radio on for her, and she hates the radio for the most part, so I put the TV on, and we watched the end of some movie I can't remember the name of, and then "Forrest Gump" came on so we watched that. She really did appear to be watching it for much of the time, in between looking at me, being slightly agitated, and napping. My cousin Sofie and aunt Betty called in the afternoon and I chatted with them for awhile before putting Betty on speaker phone so she could talk to mom. Mom was actually looking at the phone, and seemed to be hearing at least some of what Betty was saying. They're coming a week from today for another visit and I absolutely can't wait. Hopefully by then, mom will be at the next facility (RIC God willing) and doing even better than she is now. When the nurse came in to check on her, I inquired about the wounds on her head under the helmet and how they were healing. They lifted off her helmet to check on them, and my eyes about popped out of my head. The place where they'd removed the bone flap before had only been delineated by the line of staples (or the incision line after the staples were removed), but the shape of her head was round, and the soft spot was actually bulging a bit because of the swelling. Today when I caught a glimpse, it was like a huge crater!!! Slightly unsettling, but also GREAT because it means the brain swelling is going WAY DOWN! I mean, we're talking at least 1 inch deep if not 2 inches!! Not gonna lie, it does look a little scary, but it's also a beautiful sight to me. :)

After "Forrest Gump," "Saving Private Ryan" came on (clearly a Tom Hanks day) and I tried pointing out that she and I had visited the D-Day beaches together...she seemed to be listening to me and looking at the TV, but who can be sure? So I stayed and watched with her a bit more, and then said my goodnights. She seems to really like it when I kiss her on the cheeks, so I try to do it a whole bunch. When I touch her cheek, sometimes she turns her head toward my hand, and I take heart. I love her so much, she's so dear to me. I'm getting to know the little nuances of her expressions on her face, because she does indeed have several different ones. Sometimes she raises her left eyebrow a little when she looks at me too, which is too cute. She's definitely in there, trying to come out little by little.

So an okay day I guess, all in all. Please, keep your comments coming, I look so forward to them at the end of the day - they give me a boost. Thanks for your continued support and love., keep that coming too.